Forgiveness

Do not forget.

Forgiveness is interesting.

Because I forgive you doesn't mean that I need to trust you.

One lying SOB in particular, who I've blocked and muted, recently remembered that he had my email address. So, this person apologized to me.

Why did this person apologize? He actually apologized for something I did not care about, and did not hold against the schlub.

How does that work?

This schmuck posted something online. We won’t go into what. And a lot of our mutual friends said, “Do not do this. This is a Bad Idea.”

But no, it was a GREAT IDEA. And if you disagreed with him, you were wrong, bad, evil, and hated Jesus. I think he even said some variation on that last part in real life.

His further response was to provoke and antagonize all of these people, many of whom were just trying to help the twit in question. And then, after all of the angry replies had been carefully clipped and rearrange, there was created a collage of people just horribly! Horribly! attacking this idiot.

Who were these people making this idiot into a faux “victim”? Let’s see.

These people included:

• A publisher I had at the time

• A friend who would become my publisher within a few years

• The best man at my wedding

• And Me

I object to liars. And I’ll go more into that in a moment.

But what was the apology for? Was it for lying about all these people, and me?

No, the apology came for the original post, which was tacky and stupid, but nothing to end a friendship over.

Though I do have to worry about someone who doesn’t think that the slander and libel of honest, genuine people is worth apologizing for. And this prick has even lied about people who actually helped prop up and aided the twit along the way.

So, said lying sack of crap didn't acknowledge that he was a liar.

Thus, the apology itself is untrustworthy.

Of course, it gets better.

Despite having my email and my phone number, this schlub has harassed my wife, my fans, my friends, and my followers, whining to anyone who will listen that I’m being mean by blocking him.

Some people don't seem to understand that they are blocked for their protection. If I have blocked you, I avoid temptation to hurl rocks. If I work hard to forget you, I can’t wish you harm, or spend time disemboweling you.

Besides, I’ve learned my lesson once already.

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I covered this once, along ago, but I guess it bears repeating.

Many, many moons ago, I had a lady friend who needed me to pick her from from a police precinct. She'd been arrested for shop lifting. Even though she’d told me she’d shoplifted before, this time she really was (supposedly) set up by an acquaintance.

It was a lie, of course. I was stupid enough to believe that I was special. That she wouldn't lie to me. Or if she did, she'd retract it soon enough. It took her three days, and by then, I figured she'd been honest with me about having been set up.

I cut her off. Angrily. Loudly. Over the phone.

Four months later, I forgave her.

My mistake was associating with her again afterwards. Just to hang out and talk, just like before.

Why a mistake? Six months later, she drugged me. With something to make me loosen up so I would finally sleep with her— a goal she'd been trying to attain for three years at the time.

We won’t go into the lies she told after that in an attempt to tie me to her further.

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So now, when a lying prick complains to anyone who will listen about how mean I'm being, because I “won’t forgive,” it is a misunderstanding.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean I get to be used as a prop in someone else’s sideshow.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean I get to put up with your BS on a daily basis so I can be aggravated for your entertainment.

Forgiveness does not mean that I trust you. I especially cannot trust a proven liar. When I see what they will lie about—WHO they will lie about— trust is gone. Poof. It’s never coming back.

Frankly, as far as I’m concerned, the amount of lies told just within those instances, I’m not even certain I was EVER told the truth, about ANYTHING. After lying ABOUT me and my friends, what's to stop direct lies to my face? About everything? Why should I believe anything ever said to me before, or ever again?

In this particular instance, it's hard to figure out what I hate about this jerk more: that I was lied about and insulted, or that my friends were lied about and insulted. 

Or that my wife and friends were harassed, all because this twit could wear a MARTYR sandwich board all day to anyone who would listen.

It's a cliché, but broken trust doesn't get fixed. Especially when one thinks it’s funny to burn bridges with your friends and allies are still on it.

And you will note, that I have avoided pronouns here. You cannot tell if this is a s/he/it. Why? Because when someone constantly nails themselves to a cross and blames other people, giving them more fodder for being a victim is just counter productive.

Now, I have, of course, dodged multiple bullets with this liar. Since then, this parasite was trolling the Vegas strip for adult entertainment and cocaine, has been served divorce papers claiming abuse, etc, etc.

Funny thing is, the parasite hopped into a thread where that was latter part came up. And wouldn’t you know? I got a phone call. From the Liar. My wife wasn’t called and harassed. My friends weren’t contacted. I got the call directly. It’s almost like my number was still in the Liar’s cell phone.

Of course I hung up and let it to go voice mail.

One of these days, I will, of course, learn how to set up my voicemail.

I’m so old, I remembered when it was automatically set up for you with a new cell phone.

Anyway…

I hope the moral of the story is clear. I have learned my lesson with liars. Once they start lying to you, it’s over. It’s a life built on quicksand. Nothing is reliable. Everything is open ended. You might as well try to have a relationship with a hall of mirrors. If I can’t trust X to tell the truth about anything, then there’s no point.

Jesus said He was The Way, The Truth and The Life. I’ve always cultivated Truth as my one virtue. And I don’t understand people who lie all the time. I don’t want to.

I forgive, but never forget.