Strong Female Character Problems

Another #TBT post.

Seriously, watching this entire nonsense evolve over the years has been wild. I’ve seen it go from feminist whining that Strong Female Characters aren’t strong enough, to “why aren’t women men” to … whatever they’re doing right now. Women are men? Men should be women? What have you. Originally posted 4/12/16 10:08 PM. Updated to include some of the stupidity that’s happened since.

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What the hell is it with these really freaking tiny women adopting the “strong female character” trope?

Now, if you've read my novels, you know that I have no problem with kick ass women. I’ve defended against that stupidity from feminazis often enough. Look at my defense of women in military science fiction. Or my article on SFCs. Or when I beat up on the idiocy of Tor writer Liz Bourke.

On the other hand, there is a major problem with the definition of “Strong Female Character” that's being used. Because, sorry, when I create a woman character who is ALSO a bad ass, I also make certain that these women are either a) not a size zero, or b) fighting in creative, indirect ways. (I also make sure she has a personality that isn’t “boss bitch” but we’ll get there.)

Why? A few reasons. To start with, even among well-skilled (and equally skilled) male fighters, the bigger fighter is probably going to win — the odds are nearly certain. There’s a good reason that Loki rarely, if ever, directly engages with Thor — Thor has got at least fifty pounds of muscle on him. Maybe 100. Depending on the comic, the Joker is not squaring off against Batman and exchanging punches most of the time, because Batman is twice Joker's weight.

Hell, if you have two pro-wrestlers, how many of them fight exactly the same? When you get out of different weight classes, the changes are extreme. But you're not going to have a 5'6" wrestler like Rey Mysterio take on the 6'11" Undertaker in a direct fight — the smaller wrestler will be bouncing around the ring like a ping pong ball, and trying to catch him is a pain in the ass. Small people fight different than bigger people. Simple as that.

So, why treat women so much differently than men in this area? Seriously, there are weight differences between men, but somehow, all women are allowed to fight exactly the same way as men in media, even though women are naturally 50-100 pounds lighter?

Granted, in some cases, this works — when these well-trained kick ass females are going up against untrained hoodlums, there is no contest. That's superior skill versus brute strength. I'd take a collection of Marines with handguns versus three dozen MS-13 members armed with SMGs any day of the week.

But, somehow, as I go through my collection of media, which grows larger with each passing day, the kick ass woman are getting smaller, and their opponents (many of whom are supposed to be of equal talent and ability) are getting bigger.

For example, look at Jaimie Alexander, who was basically playing Jason Bourne on Blindspot — she can kick the ass of almost everyone she comes across. She is possibly better known as the Lady Sif in the Thor films.

Okay, yes, she's very pretty. But I didn't pick this photo for the underwear value.

Look at her arms.

Now look at her legs.

Where's the muscle?

She's 5'9", but she's also a toothpick. I am never happier than when she's using weaponry, because her shooting someone feels more believable than her bringing down a 6'3" thug with her bare hands. Seriously, can we have some muscle tone?

Enter the other 5'9" female bad ass who has spent her days swinging a sword.

Yeah, I know Xena is a stereotype, but please look at these two actresses, and riddle me this, Batman, which one looks more believable in terms of being able to hold her own in general?

Lucy Lawless was not a toothpick, and was not “a guy with breasts,” and she had this bright light in her eyes right before she wiped the floor with everyone in a berserker rage, and she looked like she was having fun. (Yes, I’m ignoring some of the later seasons. I think I ditched the show somewhere around the time she met Lucifer ... or when she was crucified by Julius Cesar, after having only met King David ... yeah, that show hurt my brain after a while).

And even after all you do the compare and contrast in build, why are the “strong women fighters” straight-up brawlers? When you consider that not even all men fight like this, why are all women fighting like this? Are the stunt coordinators that stupid? (Unlikely). Or are the directors and writers? (That's where my money is).

Hell, the closest we have to a Lucy Lawless type these days is Adrianne Palicki. She, sadly, was wasted on a Wonder Woman pilot from David E. Kelly (seriously, who allowed the lawyer show guy to make Wonder Woman?), and is currently being wasted on Agents of SHIELD.

People who have better things to do with their lives might recognize her as Perkins from John Wick.

Note, from this photo, three things.

1. Her body type is not "Toothpick."

2. She is 5'11" in body armor.

3. She is holding an improvised weapon, because people who fight have weaponry.

Thank you. Was that so hard?

Frankly, I think I would have preferred her to being Wonder Woman in the films than Gal Gadot (Who I liked perfectly fine, thank you). Why? Because Wonder Woman was many things, but never a toothpick. Heck, I would have even taken Hayley Atwell (Agent Carter), who is 5'7", and not a size zero.

Does anyone remember Antje Traue from Man of Steel? I mean, look at this woman.

Oh wow, look! Muscles!

Height? 5'6"

Can we have her in some of these films?

Seriously, Hollywood, what are you doing to get these toothpicks as actresses? It's very offputting. There's "thin" and then there's "good God, please eat a hamburger, I'm expecting you to break."

This is why, at the end of the day, was the most believable kick ass woman in current  media Scarlet Johansson's Black Widow.

Why? Because despite her being 5'3" (yes, she's that tiny), she's 1) not a toothpick 2( uses weaponry and 3) she fights in so many varied and sundry methods and styles, she never (to my recollection) takes someone on directly and / or bare handed. She's jumping on people and breaking necks, or dropping them with a gadget, or just shooting them.

Hell, remember Black Widow in Avengers, where she just stood square against Hawkeye and exchanged blows with him? Of course you don't, because it never happened. She jumped all over the place like a freaking rubber ball, and catch her if you can.

Iron Man 2, aside from a few moments (like her acting as a counter-weight to string up someone three times her weight with a garrote) she spent the whole fight in the corridor bouncing around. There was a lot less in the way of suspension of disbelief going the rounds. And Jon Favreau likes making himself comic relief. Pity that what he did with Happy Hogan in that scene is what the MCU started doing with main characters in their own movies (Hey, Doctor Strange, Black Panther, Shang-Chi …).

Don't get me wrong, there are places and points where not only should these smaller women be used, the can, and have, been used WELL. Black Widow was intelligently executed. Remember Rey in The Force Awakens? She was tiny, short, and the managed to be victorious in her light saber duel because she fought smart — she spent most of the fight strategically maneuvering (running) to better positions, using her environment, and was fighting a partially trained Sith who had already been shot with the SciFi equivalent of a howitzer. It’s the only reason why TFA didn’t really trigger any of my alarm bells: “She beat someone who was literally bleeding out. Big deal. This should be an interesting rematch.” So much for optimism.

Frankly, the best points where getting these tiny, tiny women to perform great feats of strength is, really, science fiction or fantasy. Whether it's the Bionic Woman or Summer Glau as a Terminator, or Buffy the Vampire slayer, it's impressive because they're so small. Supergirl is fine, because, well, she's a freaking alien. But this isn't how normal people operate.  Hell, Buffy was supposed to be stronger than your average bear, and she still jumped around all over the place.

Why is Buffy the Vampire Slayer better executed than some of these more "serious" thrillers, like Blindspot? (Hell, I'm actually surprised that Jaime Alexander isn't better built, considering she has to carry what looks like at least twenty pounds of plastic armor in the Thor films. I didn't expect her to be that tiny.)

For a moment, let's look at my books … with normal characters, because I'm not counting the vampire as "normal." That's covered under my "science fiction and fantasy” exception.

(Though I should note, Amanda Colt is not the toothpick Jaimie Alexander. I think I would rather have Scarlet Johansson, if she were a little taller. Anyway...)

If you haven't read / don't recall The Pius Trilogy, I have three women who have gotten into fights.

Exhibit A) Wilhelmina Goldberg: Five-feet tall (really 4'11") Goldberg is a computer nerd. She used to work for the NSA, but went over to the Secret Service to audit security, since she's not tall enough to jump in front of Presidents. Her fights included: punching someone in the balls, and dropping low and cutting their Achilles tendons. That was it. She didn’t finish fights, she basically played a support role. Because she’s a tiny nerd, not a veteran

Exhibit B) Maureen McGrail: somewhere around 5'9 (because I don't recall). She's ridiculously over skilled. Even though she has more black belt levels than Chuck Norris, her fighting style boiled down to: attack joints, attack eyes, and deflecting, rather than blocking attacks. Squaring up with guys? No. No. And hell no.

Exhibit C) Manana Shushurin: 5'7" or so. Also insanely well-trained. Her primary form of fighting? Shooting people in the head. Yes, really. She may have gotten into three actual physical altercations in the entire trilogy, but most of the time, she just shot her enemies. Because bullets are your friend.

Seriously, at the end of the day, can we have a collection of characters and actresses who look, well, healthy? I'm tired of the cliche. It's getting problematic, and the execution is getting more and more lazy as things go on. At least in the Thor films, Alexander's Lady Sif is covered in body armor to bulk her up. But in general, the actresses seem to be getting smaller and shorter, and becoming more like empty-handed, bare-knuckle brawlers. And it really needs to stop.

It needed to stop in 2016.

Instead, it’s only gotten worse.